I had a creepy foreign family in my section last night. They yelled at each other the entire time in some kind of Eastern European language and ordered in broken English. They ordered a chocolate cake for dessert and the youngest member of the family took it upon himself to “make” me (their waiter) a present. This creepy little foreign shit licks the remain chocolate on the plate into the shape of a heart.
The family left without leaving a tip. I guess they thought letting their youngest son tongue the fuck out of a plate was enough gratuity for me….I hate foreigners.
-Mark
Today is National Ranch Dressing Day. Every waiter and waitress cringes at the sight ranch dressing.
Even mentioning extra ranch in to someone in the food service industry inspires the image of a fat, needy patron sucking down diet coke and dripping cellulite all over the restaurant. I don’t know what the connection between loving ranch dressing and sucking at life is…but it exists and everyone here at BreakRoomStories thought it would be fun to devote today to shaming all those ranch guzzling douche-bags.
