Posts Tagged ‘Humor’
Restaurant Randomness
Posted: May 15, 2013 in Photos, Restaurant RandomnessTags: drinks, food, food service, how to be a waiter, Humor, life, musings, Photos, random, waitress problems
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Dude I Was Almost Done
Posted: May 15, 2013 in StoriesTags: Bartender, breakroomstories, Disgusting, Dumb People, food service, Funny, Humor, restaurants, Server, Stories, Waiter, WTF
I’ve learned that some people think they are being discreet with sex in public, but really they’re just drunk and oblivious. I’ve also learned that there are others that simply do not give a shit, and will blatantly fuck anywhere.
One time there was an older couple, sitting at the bar, off in a corner by the wall. He looked really sleepy, and she was shaking a little bit and they weren’t talking much. At first I didn’t realize what was going on, and I thought they were just awkward as hell. Nope. Dude was getting a handy under the bar, and an extremely weird one apparently. He was just sitting there, head rolling around looking tired, while she furiously manhandled him, while trying to look around and play it cool.
I confront them: ”Hey folks, how you doing there? Can I get you anything? So where you from? Locals? Here on vacation? How do ya like it so far? When I approached they freaked out a little bit, and sat there looking at me, trying to make a coherent sentence. Eventually I told them, ”You may want to save that for later, we have cameras in here.”Lady looks embarrassed, and the guy says, “Dude I was almost done” Gross
-Brace
ALSE: Hump Day!
Posted: May 15, 2013 in A Little Somethin Extra to Get You Through Your Shift, Hump Day, Photos, VideosTags: dirty humor, food, Girls, Humor, hump day, life, musings, Photos, video
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One of The Only Tables I Will Remember
Posted: May 15, 2013 in StoriesTags: Humor, Kids, restaurants, Server, server stories, Stories, Waiter, waiter stories
Once only once, did I have a really sweet experience with a table with a kid. I saw them come in with a 7(ish) year old boy, and thought, 1 kid I can handle this. I get to the table, and they insist on letting the little boy tell me his specific order for his drink, which involved many different combinations of sodas. I pretended I was writing it all down, and of course, went in the back, and just gave him a glass of blended soda.
The rest of night with that table went fine. When they were leaving, the little boy said that it was the best soda he’d ever had, and gave me a little certificate the size of a business card saying that I was the best waitress he’d ever had.
-Jenifer
Modern Toilet: A Toilet Themed Restaurant…
Posted: May 15, 2013 in VideosTags: food, food drinks, food service, Funny, Humor, restaurants, server stories, waiter stories, WTF
At the entrance is our mascot….a poo poo!
PEANUT CHICKEN
Posted: May 14, 2013 in StoriesTags: creep, Disgusting, Dumb People, food service, Horrible Customers, Humor, restaurants, Server, server stories, Waiter, waiter stories
Today takes the cake, I had a “gentleman” sit at my table and order the PEANUT CHICKEN. I drop off his dinner then fast forward 15 minutes, he flags me down obviously in distress clenching his throat. He asks if there were nuts in his dish…I say yes sir you did order the PEANUT CHICKEN. He screams at the top of his lungs, “I AM ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS YOU ASSHOLE WAITER!” Then kinda starts choking. At first I expected Ashton Kutcher to run out of the back and tell me I just got punked but this guy was serious. Fast forward to the paramedics getting called and him taking a ride to the hospital. It is hard for me to believe that this man has managed to stay alive this long…what kind of jerk orders the peanut chicken with a serious allergy to nuts!? He got what he deserved for talking to me the way he did! Sorry not Sorry
-Mike
Ranch Does Not Go With Everything
Posted: May 14, 2013 in StoriesTags: Disgusting, Dumb People, food service, Funny, Humor, restaurants, Server, server stories, Waiter, waiter stories, WTF
I work at a chain Italian restaurant. This guy orders chicken Alfredo and a side of ranch. I am assuming the ranch is for the little tiny piece of salad he is working on, so I put in the order and grab his side of ranch. It sits there till I drop the chicken Alfredo. This psycho grabs the side of ranch and dumps it into his chicken Alfredo, stirs it up, and takes a giant bite! Grossssss!
-Tiffany
Can I Just Say That People Who Work at Restaurants Are Not Your Slaves?
Posted: May 13, 2013 in Revenge, StoriesTags: breakroomstories, Disgusting, Dumb People, food drinks, food service, Funny, Horrible Customers, Humor, restaurants, server stories, waiter stories, WTF
We are also not your servants. We sure as hell aren’t your dog and we are not your mother or your maid. I cannot stand when people have no manners, are rude, dirty or just have no idea how to conduct themselves in public.
Here’s a few general reminders for next time you go out to eat:
- If you walk in and there is a hostess you can generally assume YOU DO NOT SEAT YOURSELF
- Once said hostess seats you IT IS RUDE TO MOVE TABLES WITHOUT ASKING
- Restaurants generally follow a seating rotation. That being said there is a reason you’re being sat where you are.
- People make mistakes. Hostesses and waitresses are people too.
- If you’re polite, I can almost guarantee your service will be 100x better.
- Waiters and waitresses make about 2 dollars an hour: most of which they have to give back to the restaurant. TIP YOUR SERVER.
- Say please and thank you. It honestly does make a difference.
- If you’re going to request a table, don’t request one that you can obviously see is dirty.
- A call ahead is different from a reservation.
- If everyone in the restaurant can hear your conversation, YOU ARE TALKING TOO LOUD.
- The menus are not place mats
-Miranda
Please Remember What You Ordered
Posted: May 13, 2013 in Dumb Customers, StoriesTags: dumb customers, food, food runner, Humor, restaurants
I hate when as a food runner i’m holding very hot plates and the family of five has no idea what they ordered as i repeat “derp burger” four times. Meanwhile my flesh is burning away.
-Tavo
