Posts Tagged ‘restaurants’

I am a host and its my job to make sure the restroom is clean. Today a man walks to the counter and tells me the bathroom is dirty. I walk into the bathroom and there is a pair of tighty whitys with a GIANT shit stain on them sitting right next to the toilet…. awesome.

-Trevor

About these ads

Breakfast server here: Today two broke ass looking girls got sat at my table. I grab the coffee pot assuming these ratchets are going to need some caffeine. As I approach the table mess #1 says to mess #2 “I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?” I tried so hard not to laugh as I asked if they wanted coffee.

-John

I am a host. At the host stand we have a bucket with crayons for little kids. On the way out of my restaurant a woman stopped at the host stand and started shoveling crayons into her purse. I said, “ma’am those are for children please stop stealing our crayons” she replied, ” Listen here missy don’t be tellin me what to do! besides you can afford to let me steal crayons” then she zipped up her giant purse and ran out of the restaurant. I was speechless.

-Samantha

Me: “Will you be having dessert this evening?”

Old Man: “I was going to ask for sex but I assume that isn’t on the menu….is it?”

Me: “Just a minute, I’ll ask our 6’5″ chef Hugo if he’s got any in the back.”

-Kylie

A “guest” walks up to the host stand with a plate of mostly eaten fries in her hand.

Woman: (rudely interrupting the hosts helping another guest) ‘Scuse me!! My waitress is “too busy” to come help our table
Host: What can we do for you, ma’am?
Woman: My fries is cold. I need new ones

Mind you, the woman was STILL chewing on fries

Host: (confused as to what to do) Well, let me find your server because we may need to charge you for a new side.
Woman: You ain’t charging me for no new fries!! These was cold. I ain’t satisfied

At this point, I step in to aid the obviously confused/annoyed hosts

Me: Ma’am, is there something I can help you with?
Woman: (again, rudely) She ALREADY helping me.
Me: Oh, well, why don’t you tell me where you are sitting and I can bring you a new plate of fresh, hot fries
Woman: I don’t know where the fuck my table is! I don’t know the number!!
Me: OK, well, how about you SHOW me where your table is so we can bring you those fries
Woman: You can come find me! Ima look the same sittin’ down!

-Tommy

Are fucking gross, that is all.

-Jenny

I made a post about business lunches a couple of days ago. I got fed up! Today this pompous prick came in again, sat in my section again, and was a douche bag again. So when he paid with his credit card I came back to the table and said, “sorry sir but your card was declined.” He demanded that I try it again. To which I replied, “Sorry but I ran it 3 times.” He got super flustered and one of his associates picked up the tab. I hope he learned a lesson!

-Brad

Click the picture to view gallery
15 of 15

Thank you for all your submissions! If you want your picture featured in this gallery submit it to BreakRoomStories@gmail.com

I just cleaned up green puke amd its only 11:12 a.m.

-Stacy