Posts Tagged ‘server stories’

When there are clean open tables throughout the restaurant, why in Gods name do you INSIST on picking the only dirty table in the restaurant, and then get pissy when you ask us to clean it off?

-Bri

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I am a host and its my job to make sure the restroom is clean. Today a man walks to the counter and tells me the bathroom is dirty. I walk into the bathroom and there is a pair of tighty whitys with a GIANT shit stain on them sitting right next to the toilet…. awesome.

-Trevor

Breakfast server here: Today two broke ass looking girls got sat at my table. I grab the coffee pot assuming these ratchets are going to need some caffeine. As I approach the table mess #1 says to mess #2 “I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?” I tried so hard not to laugh as I asked if they wanted coffee.

-John

Me: “Will you be having dessert this evening?”

Old Man: “I was going to ask for sex but I assume that isn’t on the menu….is it?”

Me: “Just a minute, I’ll ask our 6’5″ chef Hugo if he’s got any in the back.”

-Kylie

I had a lady complain that her salad was too cold, and now she had to let it sit and warm up before she could eat it. WTF!?

-Bert

If I said everything I thought during one shift I would be fired 79 times.

-Jenny

Big family table comes in. Everything goes fine. Bill was probably $150 or so. The dad pays. I see him drop a $20 on the table. The family all gets up to leave. Last to leave? Mom. She gets up, watches everybody start heading for the door, picks up the $20, leaves a $5 instead.

-Lucy

I just watched a lady pour like 20 Splednda packets into her iced tea then ask me for, “more Splenda….Like alot more….”

-Barbie