Posts Tagged ‘waiter problems’

Me: “Hi, I’m Megan, I’ll be your waitress tonight.”

Customer: “Well, hi, I’m Joe and I’ll be your customer for tonight”

Oh, the laughs that were had. ._.


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For some reason the dishwasher has started to turn its self on, while its still open. FML.


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I just cleaned up green puke amd its only 11:12 a.m.


When you split a check you officially fall into the category of what we in the service industry call douchetarded. Have fun with that.


When I bring the bill and the customer says….”I didn’t order that” I want to drop kick them straight in the face.


Walked up to my table having an argument, this is what I heard her say right before I introduced myself:

“Maybe if your dick was thicker than your goddamn eyebrows we wouldn’t be having this conversation”



A party of 7 high schoolers come in and take a high-top table. I was the person to take their table. I get sodas and breadsticks for them, nothing weird.

Fast forward 5 minutes, several of our cooks start coughing uncontrollably. I walk out front and the entire front-of-house is in coughing fits. People are leaving. Still unaware of what the actual fuck is going on, I walk up to my table and my throat starts on fire and my eyes and nose start running uncontrollably.

Turns out, one of the girls was given pepper spray by her parents. One of the guys, thinking it was funny, sprayed it under the table for a lengthy period of time. It cleared the restaurant, it went through the ventilation into the back, EVERYWHERE. Police were called and took both the kid and the girl away and I was sent to the hospital as my face would not stop leaking.

We didn’t press charges but it could have been serious if we did, that is considered food tampering with a poisonous substance. (I can’t recall verbatim). Use of a weapon in public, and much more.


Had someone send back pita bread because… it “didn’t taste organic.” The sound of my facepalm could be heard miles away.


My level of bullshit tolerance with clients is considered zen. I’m practically a Buddha at this point.