I’m from the south and have a bad habit of saying “you guys” on accident sometimes. Said it to two middle aged ladies one time when getting drinks and next thing I know they are leaving and one of them is crying. Apparently the crying one had cancer and was insecure about her femininity after losing her hair (she was wearing a wig.) How was I suppose to know?!?
-Katie
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This is a GREAT site! I waitressed all through college and thought I’d heard everything….even a man who asked me for PEANUT BUTTER on his baked potato!
To the “you guys” issue; I really don’t care for that, either, but understand it’s meant to be friendly. Not every woman likes to be addressed as a ‘guy,’ but it beats what they call me now that I’m older: “sweetheart,” “sweetie,” or “honey.” But I smile and say, ‘thank you, “sweetheart,” “sweetie,” or “honey.” :)
I’m not crazy about the “you guys” greeting as I think it’s too familiar and casual, but that’s my thing. But to your experience, cancer treatment, namely chemo, is a quite extremely emotional experience for some people. You could have addressed her by as ma’am, you ladies, or even by her own name & she may have reacted in a similar manner. Perhaps servers should just refer to the customers as “you” and give each one an inclusive smile. – btw – I could NEVER be a server!
It’s a difficult change to make but I started intentionally using ‘folks’ and it has worked well for me
You can’t help it if some people are super easily upset. I think as long as it is said lightly and in a friendly manner it should be taken as harmless. But I’m not most people.
did you smooth it over, apologize?
The way we speak to outsiders so comfortably can sometimes get us into unintentional trouble. Sometimes we have to take a step back and remind ourselves that what is familiar and friendly to us isn’t necessarily the case for others, and to address them differently.
Ha! I do this too!
I’m from Texas and say ya’ll a lot and dude lol
Reblogged this on The Hot Topic.
I almost got jumped for saying “you boys hungry” like I would to anybody else, to a couple black guys once. fml I was just being friendly
i do that everytime….but I got it from the Electric Company