I’m from the south and have a bad habit of saying “you guys” on accident sometimes. Said it to two middle aged ladies one time when getting drinks and next thing I know they are leaving and one of them is crying. Apparently the crying one had cancer and was insecure about her femininity after losing her hair (she was wearing a wig.) How was I suppose to know?!?


  1. lulujbf7 says:

    This is a GREAT site! I waitressed all through college and thought I’d heard everything….even a man who asked me for PEANUT BUTTER on his baked potato!

    To the “you guys” issue; I really don’t care for that, either, but understand it’s meant to be friendly. Not every woman likes to be addressed as a ‘guy,’ but it beats what they call me now that I’m older: “sweetheart,” “sweetie,” or “honey.” But I smile and say, ‘thank you, “sweetheart,” “sweetie,” or “honey.” :)

  2. grandeldress says:

    I’m not crazy about the “you guys” greeting as I think it’s too familiar and casual, but that’s my thing. But to your experience, cancer treatment, namely chemo, is a quite extremely emotional experience for some people. You could have addressed her by as ma’am, you ladies, or even by her own name & she may have reacted in a similar manner. Perhaps servers should just refer to the customers as “you” and give each one an inclusive smile. – btw – I could NEVER be a server!

  3. yohwtf says:

    It’s a difficult change to make but I started intentionally using ‘folks’ and it has worked well for me

  4. You can’t help it if some people are super easily upset. I think as long as it is said lightly and in a friendly manner it should be taken as harmless. But I’m not most people.

  5. cyberbonn says:

    did you smooth it over, apologize?

  6. eadavisblog says:

    The way we speak to outsiders so comfortably can sometimes get us into unintentional trouble. Sometimes we have to take a step back and remind ourselves that what is familiar and friendly to us isn’t necessarily the case for others, and to address them differently.

  7. LoveJunkie says:

    I’m from Texas and say ya’ll a lot and dude lol

  8. aedanwriter says:

    Reblogged this on The Hot Topic.

  9. jmallouf says:

    I almost got jumped for saying “you boys hungry” like I would to anybody else, to a couple black guys once. fml I was just being friendly

  10. John Migueis says:

    i do that everytime….but I got it from the Electric Company

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