Tonight at work I was standing next to one of my 2 top tables asking if their food had come out alright. The guy at the table went to grab a napkin that had two ramekins of honey mustard dressing on top of it. He pulled the napkin out too quickly and at just the right angle for the dressing to fly off the table and splatter all over me and the floor. He watched the whole thing happen and still had the audacity to smile and say “We’ll just pretend like that wasn’t your fault.”
-Talia
Break Room Stories 
WOW. Darn you for asking if everything was alright. Rolls piggy eyes. How rude of him – snorts XOXO – Bacon