Archive for the ‘Revenge’ Category

I spat in my coworker drink while he was away. He was an asshole who was stealing my tips and my cigs out of my purse. I caught him twice.


Let’s face it, there are horrible people out there, and since we are in the service industry we have to take their trash. This video is shining beacon of hope, one cook sick of their shit, laying down the hammer. Enjoy and live vicariously through this video next time a scum sucker ends up in your section.

and don’t forget….tip your waitress

Had a dine and dash table of 3 teens one night I was working. Our host recognized one kid from school saying his dad is a firefighter. My manager called the fire department and 30 minutes later a fire truck rolls up with lights on. The kid and his dad walk in. The dad made his son apologize to the server, management, and pay. I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard in my life.


he used to work at a Wing Place in a college town, and a girl came in once to pick up an order of wings. A few minutes later, the girl comes back in and slams the bag down on the counter. “There’s feathers on my wings.” My sister opens the box, and lo and behold, there were feathers in the box of wings.

Now, as nearly everyone alive knows or can guess, wings don’t come into the restaurant with feathers still on them. No part of the chicken does, even whole chickens are pre-plucked. This girl had added feathers from god knows where to her order, probably in some ill thought-out attempt to get her money back and her order replaced.

The story does have an amusing ending. She didn’t get a refund, and the guys in the kitchen threw her returned wings — added feathers and all — back into the frier, added more sauce, and served it to her. You wanna mess with your own food? Fine, you have to eat it.


Back in 1994 I was working at a restaurant Colorado.  Halloween was coming up and there was a huge party I was wanting to go to so I requested the day off.  My manager came up to me and asked me why I needed that day off and without hesitation I looked at him and said, with a straight face,”It’s a religious holiday, I’m Pagan.”  He just turned and walked away.  I got the day off and enjoyed the party.  I think he was scared of me after that.


I’m a hostess at a restaurant and we only take reservations for parties of 8 or larger. A lady walks in and tells me she has a reservation for 6. I tell her that we didnt have the reservation taken, but I am more than happy to get her a table immediately. Her husband decides to make a little joke, and his fat wife turns to him and shouts “hunny! dont make smart jokes infront of them…they are hostesses they dont understand smart things.” After that I’m already very annoyed, and i take her to a table. As a rule in our restaurant, we have to wait for the guest to take the menues from us, and we cant set them down on the table. So I am holding out the menu for this fat bitch and she looks at me, scoffs, and says “jesus christ do you know how to do your SIMPLE job?! put the menu on the damn table.” so i set it on the table and leave.
My manager comes over to see me fuming after what this lady said, and he approached the table and said “excuse me mam? we are going to have to ask you to leave our restaurant and never return. We dont allow people to harass our employees in such a way. Thank you.”
Gave her a big ol “have FABULOUS day ma’am.” with a smirk :)


I worked at a Chili’s while in college then I joined National Guard, in ROTC, and so forth…so basically I still had my name on the books in order to show up and take a shift when I had free time.

So there I am, working a weekend shift when this guy comes in and orders a burger with no mustard – We’re slammed, and the kitchen made a mistake – he’s got mustard on his burger. He calls me over. “You are an idiot. I said no mustard – there’s mustard on this burger. How hard is it not to put mustard on a burger?”

Ok, he’s a little hotheaded, but we did make a mistake. So I apologize, bring it back, tell the cooks I need one without mustard. A minute later they put it up, and I bring it back. I’m just walking away, when he stands up and yells, “Get back here, you stupid moron!”

Everyone stops and looks. I turned around with a look on my face that probably ought to have been a warning to any reasonable person- but then a reasonable person wouldn’t have hollered at a server for a kitchen’s mistake. We are not dealing with a reasonable individual, and he starts to shout, gesticulating furiously, putting his finger in my face.

“You god damn idiot, all you did was scrape the mustard off, and there’s still mustard on my god damn burger. What is wrong with you? Are you retard? You’re a goddamn moron, you dumb piece of shit!”

For a second I’m stunned. And then it comes to me – I literally do not have to take this. So I look him in the eye and I say, “Sir, I don’t know who you think you are, but you sure as Hell can’t talk to me like that. You sit down, pipe down, and act like a civilized human being. And if you raise your voice again, or curse again, or insult me one more time, I’m going to graphically demonstrate how ill-advised it is to abuse an Army ranger who the government has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars teaching how to do a vast array of truly nasty things to people less deserving and more capable of defending themselves than you, you pasty, pudgy, piece of shit.” Not another word from this asshole the rest of the meal.


I lost it yesterday. I hated everything about my most recent serving position. Bad management, shitty tips, and tons of asshole customers. So when a snobby plastic bitch who is a well known shitty tipper gave me attitude yesterday I said this straight to her to her face

“Don’t ever treat people like you do and by the way you should have spent the money on your nose instead of your boobs.”

I quit that night and couldn’t be happier.


In case you missed April Fool’s Day:

It was a slow Tuesday afternoon. There were 2 tables in the restaurant I work at. One of my table is an overweight solo diner and he orders a well done steak. I put the order in and 7 minutes later he calls me back over and says this:

Customer: “um excuse me….where the hell is my steak. I am like the only person here how could my food take so long!?”

I couldn’t believe the attitude this asshole threw my way! I only had 4 more shifts at this restaurant because I had another job lined up so I said this….

Me: “You ordered a well done steak 7 minutes ago, and a well done steak takes 18 to 20 minutes to cook all the way. Would you like me to walk my happy ass back to the kitchen and change the laws of physics to get your charcoal dusted brick that used to be a delicious piece of meat? I mean I wouldn’t expect you to understand, you clearly have extensive experience at McDonald’s where “food” magically takes 2 minutes to prepare, but here where we actually make food that doesn’t automatically give you diabetes, its going to take a little bit longer.”

I walked out never looked back.